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One day, while I was helping to organize a spiritual retreat, I peeped that I did not come back and check-in with a few of our volunteers as I told them I would. As I ran into each of the people that I had not yet circled back to, I did that over-apologizing thing that a lot of feminine people are trained to do.
The last person that I did this to stopped me and was like "what did you fucking say to me? That caught me off guard and I was about to start apologizing again right when she said "don't you fucking apologize to me. You're doing your fucking best."
She felt like a mom. Not exactly my mom because she doesn't curse. But it felt like how your mom used to talk to you, through her teeth when you were little. Like when y'all were out in public somewhere and you were showing off (you know, being a child).
Anyway, it was actually kinda funny because she was literally chastising me for not giving myself enough grace in that situation. Like girl, I see you and I'm not pressed, you are! I was so scared to look like I wasn't showing up for people because I was doing too much at once, meanwhile the people were wild understanding.
Fear Still Almost Stopped Me
I had a lot of fear around releasing the original tee shirt design featuring this powerful affirmation. I was worried, that people would feel that the design was too simple. Which the design is simple, but that's because I want the focus to be on the message.
I was also scared that the cursing might not be well received. And to keep it all of the way real. It did make people feel uncomfortable. Some of my close friends agree with the message and even curse themselves, A LOT. But they were still not willing to say it with their chest. People that have purchased and worn the shirt, refuse to post photos of them in the shirt.
For a moment, I almost considered scrapping the design altogether. Then I thought, fuck that.
I did however, decide to do the hoodies and sweatpants with the affirmations in a smaller but still prominent way that seems to resonate with people a little bit more. Plus I like it more too. So thanks for coming to my TEDTalk.
TLDR: The Lesson
I guess the point is, be open to receive feedback but also stay true to yourself. That's when things get... interesting.